Let me, please allow me to, explain something to ask for help.  I accidentally said something to someone who said something like that to me first.  I even said I was, like, just talking to them for fun.  Of course, they did not respond regardless.  I realized it was bad and apologized.

My dad thinks I need to be greatly punished for any little wrong thought, which he knows, too, for example, to elaborate on how I stand.


So, I see that people are actually making me uncomfortable holding me as bad while they communicate with me in ways that are supposed to be enjoyable.  I'm not quite sure what the problem is I need to think about.  It sounds like I cracked under pressure.  No one "forgives" me.

I'm upset how things turned out, like how it didn't matter how someone thought of me, like I should forget about them.