F.Y.I., I even don't drink alcohol because I want to not lose any more brain cells, but maybe I already lost too many, more than some other people.

My schools gave stupid busywork and let the bad people socialize instead of us making use of the school time, in different ways in different schools or classes.  Everyone was just okay with this like nothing happened.  I fell behind when I was called to the counselor during classes, too, in high school, just for seeming lonely to one of my teachers.

So, why did people affect this?  I'm unwanted like Hillary Clinton.  This is really none of their business.  They are eliminating by luck.  Why can't anyone co-exist?  Is this about intentions or fate?  Like, I'm worried because in gymnastics I fell on the ground from standing by the foam pit, when I was 8 years old, though nothing happened that I knew of because I was so skinny from starting gymnastics at age 1 3/4 etc.  Do I deserve to suffer because I'm not just "used" but emotionally tortured to some degree or something.  Also, I ended up staying up late doing homework as of age 11.

If someone older I like is already famous but "ready" to be really famous by knowing me ... it sounds like the plan for them is sad.

This lady has had a "relationship" with me but became exploited to where it was like some of it became blocked in a denied way.  She didn't want it, but other people can just make it happen.


I just found it interesting and don't find and mean offense, to her.  If she is happier with what's more rightfully hers is fine.

cont.

The funny thing is I'm very well-behaved, and they aren't.

Everyone thought they had to be mean to me to be safe, like I'm in trouble with my dad.

Why are people making more problems?

It's awkward to say this, but an older lady was interested in me and my fame and how hard life was for me, and people said they "had" to make this lady have more problems being famous so I can't "get" that.

People don't like to interact with me so they can say I'm not all that.

They have a lot to offer themselves, and it is right to be nice to people; otherwise, is not in good fashion.

Why are we told to exult Late Boomers?  What do they do?  We get a little sometimes unpleasant buzz, maybe in general, at least.  Why are times so bad?

Ay Ay Ay

I just have to clean my office space!

Math homework and test.  So far, I haven't wasted it.

I think some people have to sit and watch someone who performs not because we need to learn from that person but because that person is having a moment but for a long time, not trying to say it in some bad way.  It's also not basically who you'd think it is.  So, we have to stifle our own voice and ability to function, one way or another.  I was prevented from having a good time and "relationship" with someone else because of this person, partially, in the end, I think, because that person was against it, and they are both older.

cont.

I didn't get what I wanted, in a way, and some people are still fighting it off, not sure who but maybe people I know.

People think instead of me having a relationship with someone that they can be like a part of family or a party, to ruin it.

I do agree that if someone is attractive, they can be famous ... but I didn't see the steps happen appropriately anyway.  They didn't say they wanted to but know people can do it for them.

Patrolling

Why are people always wondering if someone from Generation X is treated like a Late Boomer is or if a Late Boomer is their parent?

Because I threw a water bottle on the ground, not only can someone not have a certain kind of "relationship" with me which isn't up to me, but people think I am a bad person and they can be mean to me.  They are racist to me, too.  I was outside, and people were all bothering me around me and no one cared.  Sure, the police could have caught me and not have cared what I said about the way people got away with acting and bothering me, like being attacked by everyone like that at any given moment is okay.  I've called the non-emergency police before about these things, before, alone in my room sometimes.

I feel like a criminal in prison and for some reason I'm like a ghost there because they're still studying my case.

I'm not too worried.

People are fighting me if I get attention from Late Boomers, like they didn't really do it.

They're sure!

that I'm bad in this.

It seems people are snapping at me for getting attention from an older lady but pushing into eternity the situation they have messing around with her and making it so no one else matters, unless maybe I died.

People think they can say anything because they don't really mean it.

Well!

Well!  Some people have been very nice to me, giving me attention, and what should I do... buy them a cake?  I don't know if I can.

A lot of people go to big schools where you don't feel like you're with the same people all your life.

People think I'm bad.. it might be because of weird reasons like if I have a pimple, for skipping one of two showers a day, for an example.

Why get into intensive things of the nature I've been talking with people who have it together already?

Nobody needs people to "test" older people who like me.

Some people I have to deal with are just treating me stupidly.

It's like nobody likes me.  Why should I care about some people?

Why don't I figure?

Why is it okay for people to obsess over someone older I know instead?

It seems that we're due some more down time.

I'm am a "source."

I'm young in the 90's!

I might not be a mountain or a planet, but I am cool.

Who cares?

I don't really trust people.

I don't overly obsess, but other people are up to no good and it is a worry.

I guess it would be tragic to realize I was in the right, here, and so make it like there's a problem with other people I know, elsewhere, Orlando's fancy little dramas.  I actually know they err'ed out, but it's hard to keep tabs.

No hard feelings to anyone else's feelings! and not trying to involve certain people.

Did Orlando start worrying about things you don't have to worry about?

cont.

...like if you're wondering why you lost it.

For Active Anti-Racists

Black men always know everything, when something calls for it.

Did you know I'm moving into finals week?

I am interested in Asian and African American / black babies.

Ahh!

I just cleaned a bunch of my room and rearranged a little.  I just have to tackle the table and guess it's off to life!  Quite a lot of laundry.

Who in their right mind finds joy in being emotionally deficient, in bad ways?

I thought they were already happy, hence their success and continuing like other normal people to prosper and be happy.

Game?

So, how many famous Late Boomers do you know, famous without being on screen?

Any of them cute?  Hope they are all happy!

People think because I got something socially, I deserve to get it taken away but others are still happy and aren't lied about that they are bad for feeling uncomfortable around weird people being mean to them.

All this will hurt me, people thinking it doesn't matter if I am like other people.  Like, it's that I am not as good as a normal person.  They think it doesn't matter because normal people have their own problems, but in the end I see them coming out on top and me being dropped from the top to the bottom.  I am done; I am an adult.  There is no such thing as that we are all innocent and, therefore, if someone is down, it takes the town to sorta worsen themselves to make the other people seem better ... nor to focus more on bad people, as though they are good, and to try to make the good people seem bad because you think everyone should be equal and that this is how it goes, socially.  If someone "makes it" socially, they get "rewarded," in my book, and they live their life themselves getting better and not having people set them up to act defensive and seem worse than others and lied about in how they are socially, to bring them down like they really deserve that for reasons I mentioned.

I'm not trying to get mad at certain people, but I notice that things are happening like this.  This was harder to type up than some of the other things I have said.

Supposedly, I "didn't make it" as a normal person, according to Central Floridians.

People are obsessing themselves trying to get rid of me knowing someone.  I'm losing focus on if it's more normal people starting it or the people watching me in private.

I keep getting pushed to lose it.  I don't even have to think about people I like all the time.

People want to "bring out the worst in" me.

I don't have negative feelings towards everyone.

I'm tired of old ladies going around acting like it's only about Late Boomer women.  They get "all up in my face" and watch out for me.